CNET - How do you attract a successful CEO to an unproven company? Offer him a compensation package that gives them no incentive to make the company a success! That´s the formula that Priceline.com and Webvan took and it´s working out exactly as planned.

Both companies have lost most of their stock value and laid off hundreds of workers while the exiting CEOs are sipping margaritas on a beach in Cancun. One CEO was quick to paint a less than rosy picture of this situation though.

"Hey, this isn´t easy for us either, how long do you think I can make the payments on my three mansions, the yacht, and my Porsche collection with this? Anyone need a CEO? I´ll give you my resume link on Monster.com."

Investors are naturally thrilled to hear that their lovable CEOs are being compensated in the style to which they have become accustomed. They are so thrilled in fact that they are selling their stock to whomever will buy it trying to spread the word about these wonderful companies.

Most companies argue that the high level of compensation is needed to bring these CEOs in and ends up reaping value for the shareholder when the stock price rises. This fails to explain exactly why companies whose total stock value is less than the corner lemonade stand are compensating CEO failures so richly.

These companies also compensate their outgoing regular employees tremendously by not having security pat them down for post-it notes and other office supplies before they are escorted from the building.